A Daughter’s Thoughts

By Meg Goldberg

May 14, 2023

The 3rd Mother’s Day without my own

Her life,                                                                                                                                                                      snuffed out quietly amongst morphine drips and banned visitations  
felt extra tragic.   
2020 be damned, she must have been so lonely!                                                                                                                                    Overcome by strong emotions,                                                                                                                          harboring grief,                                                                                                                                                            I push it deep down into the darkness of my mind.                                                                                                        She would have wanted me to live happily                                                                                                               and I try to cling onto that. 
 
My mom would have wanted me to forget and let go                                                                                              of the memories of when she was                                                                                                                           not well and not herself:                                                                                                                                          the unhinged voicemails she left,                                                                                                                              how she kept wandering around,                                                                                                             and how unspeakably angry she got  
when I brought up dementia to her. 
 
More than that,                                                                                                                                                        she would have wanted me to focus                                                                                                                 on all the years we had together                                                                                                                                    before a stroke made her non-responsive.                                                                                                                                                                   Lunch dates and shopping trips,
going to the St. Paddy’s parade downtown,                                                                                                                                       and how she loved making awe inspiring meals.  


I remember her often. 
I have a treasured grocery list                                                                                                                               in her feminine handwriting                                                                                                                       tucked away for safekeeping, 
I have her knotted wedding ring                                                                                                                          and the bracelet her Father welded  
for her secured in a drawer,                                                                                                                                        I have nostalgic tendencies,                                                                                                                                  and she will never be forgotten. 

Meg Goldberg has a BA in English from West Chester University and has always expressed herself best through writing.  Her poem, “A Daughter’s Thoughts”, deals with the loss of her mom.  Meg says writing it helped her grieve in that a part of her mom is still alive within the poem..